Human
beings are creatures of emotion, however, and as soon as a word is
created through the mouth of the speaker, then that the speaker
places himself at the mercy of the other. The speaker becomes
immediately vulnerable and so exposes his inner self to the other
half of the partnership. Even the simplest of reference questions is
an offering, to some degree, of oneself to another. For many that
involves a great deal of personal pain and even for the strongest of
us, it exposes a degree of weakness which screams out against our
need for survival. We never want to display our personal
vulnerabilities to others and always have a strong tendency to mask
our true selves.
Cohen, The Hermeneutics of the Reference Question